Monday, February 15, 2010

How do you decide whom to trust?



Photo: By me, at Kalaghoda Arts Festival

Well, what a silly question you may ask. But takes a lot to start trusting people. Trust is a prerequisite to any relationship: momentary or life long, loose ties or strong.  So for example, how do you tell whom to ask the direction while driving? How do you then decide to trust this 'chosen' person. Although it might be random to spot a person to ask the way, there is a lot of activity to finally decide whether to take his word or not. If that person was right and he/she helped you thank your "judgement" or "luck".  
How to you learn to trust your mother? No one remembers, okay but still let me guess. Based on our  experiences with our mother (caring and protecting attributes) we have slowly developed a keen sense to lean on our judgment more than the random factor or luck. Now the trust comes up intuitively. Take any other example, and you will find that after a while, a certain randomness in judging people gives way to a more organised and conceptual (though sub-conscious)  algorithmic process (logic). We have a mental check box, which probably starts from physical manifestation (way they appear, way they behave and way they express) to a meta-physical one (way they think, react and judge). Its intriguing to me, all this. I know that I keenly rely on both my intuition and logic to trust people in my day to day life, though I ll leave it to the psychologists to find out how the intermingling happens. I do go wrong, though like everyone in trusting some people: sometimes because they are good at putting up a facade and at other times, because I missed the fine print. 


5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great to meet you at the workshop. This is really funny - I attended that festival too and took a picture of those masks!

Anonymous said...

"I do go wrong, though like everyone in trusting some people: sometimes because they are good at putting up a facade and at other times, because I missed the fine print."

"some" people! dont be a sadist by speaking and passing judgment about "some" people behind their backs...

nixkina said...

I'm just expressing my general notions, I just mean to say I cannot exactly pinpoint the proper mechanism of how I went wrong, but I did, some times. The statement does not refer to specific persons, guess my blog needs a disclaimer !

Anonymous said...

the point is that if at all u refer to some ppl in particular, give them a level playing field..u cant accuse them (putting up a facade!) without giving them a voice either. thats not what u call a level playing field..
good that u clarified, thou ur blog definitely needs a copyright/disclaimer.. plaguerism is abundant anyway..

Susovan said...

I trust the ones who SEEM to know what they are saying. But being the suspicious creep I am, verify what they said from at least 2 other people. ;)This seems to be a safe process.